Tips

Yesterday I went into a coffee shop but amazingly not to buy a coffee. Even more amazingly not to buy a baked good. I actually entered the cafe to buy a coffee-maker....and a cheap one at that.

I use a pour over style of coffee-maker and rumour had it that this café, behind the COC, had what I wanted. They did. Thanks for the tip, Wendy.

What really caught my eye, other than the super friendly staff, was the tip jar(s). They had two tip jars, one labeled 'kiteboarding' and the other labelled 'windsurfing'. Customers could vote for their preference by placing their tip in one of the two dishes. Sadly it looked like the two dishes were equally filled with coins. I see this as a travesty. Death to the kiters...the infidels!

I think I'll save up all my change and return to the café. So what if I give them a $10 tip. I will make a statement on behalf of all windsurfers, and that statement will be:

Windsurfers are the most popular and we're stupidly generous with our money.

Good Grandpa

When I walk around Cambridge-Narrows I rarely see any signs or billboards. There is one on the other side of the bridge that let's me know that someone is selling tires somewhere. There's a geo-thermal sign in every village in New Brunswick and we've got ours. I'll bet there's one in Harvey Station, right next to the bank likely! Of course there are always real estate signs everywhere.

In Toronto we have signage everywhere. A lot of them advertise entertainment, and the one I chose to highlight today looked quite entertaining. It's particularly relevant given that my son and my father live together! Thankfully my father never took my son to the park, got hammered and passed out on a park bench...at least not that I know.

No, Julian's grandpa was more famous for his ace fighter-pilot skills. I always chuckle when I think back to the day when Gup and Julian were racing around the Maquapit Lake dining room table in a Legoland dog fight. Julian usually won these dog fights but on this day, Manbill Von Schwarz Hügel shot Julian out of the sky. Julian was not impressed.

So.....does that make Gup a bad grandpa or a good grandpa? A good grandpa, of course! Things don't always go as planned. A good lesson, perhaps.

Speaking of plans, it occurred to me that we should all watch this movie together, then I noticed that the movie was produced by the makers of the Jackass series of movies. Ah, yeah...maybe we shouldn't watch this movie together because the Jackass movies have been quite vile.

Note: you know I'm going to secretly watch this movie on my own! It's got 'Ian' written all over it!

False Start?

In the race of life, who do you want to be? The rabbit or the turtle?

Thankfully you don't have to choose to be like one or the other. You don't have to emulate anyone, or follow anyone's path. The path is yours and yours alone, and no two paths are alike. There will be others who share the path from time to time. Ultimately, however, only you arrive at your destination. It is yours, just as everyone else has their own destination and arrival.

So.....don't bother comparing yourself to others because they are not you. You are unique. So am I.

And it's not a race.

Let's examine our family to see how others have started and where they are now. Note: we are not comparing ourselves to them...we are only looking at them because curiosity is healthy. I'm going to break the family down into two groups: fast starters and false starters (though not rabbits and hares).

Fast starters: I see this group as lucky, though I am not one of them. The fast starters had an early vision for their future, stuck with it and seemed content with their lot.

Jason: Jason had a vision to become a physiotherapist. He hit some bumps along the way, but pretty much stayed on the rails.

Wendy: she had an early vision, kept her head down and plodded through to the other side. There were challenges along the way (turned down by UofT opera school), but she persevered. Wendy worked as a telemarketer and a grocery store clerk after she got her Master's degree.

Paul: took a job in the forestry service and stuck with it, seemingly content.

Kristy: got an education degree, became a teacher (sounds almost easy).

Mootha: worked in a bank which set her up for a life of monetary appreciation (I have n'a got oeny money). Mom wanted a family and she was a pro.


False Starters: Not an unlucky group by any means, this group went down a few paths before finding one that suited them. I don't like the word 'false' because every start is real, but I'm using it anyway.

Ian: Agricultural College...hello? I have no regrets going there, but it probably wasn't my smartest career move.

Erik: he was destined to sell something, but stints in car sales and insurance didn't pan out so well.

Alex: enrolled at university but didn't follow through with it. Floated from one thing to the next for years.

Doug: started with an English degree and worked in 'communications'. Seems laughable, in hindsight.

Todd: too many false starts to mention. Seems to finally be on track, at 40.

Dana: I'm not sure if he had a vision for the future, but he got shafted along the way by those who were there to help him.

Gup: Gup's first foray at university did pan out. Of course there was a war that didn't allow him the opportunity of following through on his initial, though likely misguided, studies. The war gave him a new perspective. Bring on war!!

Linda: home economist? Not.

Joan: teacher? Not.

Dippy D: music degree at Acadia? Not.


In a league of their own: Okay, we need a third group, mostly for Uncle Tom and Lilian. Actually, I can't comment on them as I don't know if they followed a path or experimented along the way. And then there's Graeme (the best plumber in Britain). Nuff said.

There are no rabbits and turtles. There's just you, me and the great them.

If you are defined by what you do for a living, then I pity you. I hate when people ask me what I do for a living, because that doesn't speak to who I am. If you're defined by your morals and beliefs, by what you stand for and what you stand against, then I say 'lucky you'. If you don't know what you stand for and stand against, stay tuned, you soon will. Likely it will evolve over time, becoming sharper and more focused.

Be patient. Be curious.

Warriors??

warrior

noun

1. 1.

   (especially in former times) a brave or experienced soldier or fighter.

For a number of years the media has referred to some members of the Mohawk tribe as 'warriors'. It's not uncommon to hear about Mohawk Warriors.

Now we have Mi’kmaq warriors apparently, as reported by CBC.ca. I quote from a headline in this morning's news:

"Mi’kmaq warrior chief John Levi says that crackdown won’t deter new protests if SWN returns."

Later in the article cbc.ca quotes Chief Levi saying the following:

“It's always peaceful on our side,” he said. “It's up to them. But you know we never back down."

Having a so-called 'Warrior Chief' stating that "it's always peaceful on our side" creates an obvious disconnect. Methinks CBC should stop calling them 'warriors' because it presents a negative connotation, particularly when the Chief describes his people as peaceful. I think it's an unfair moniker, though it is not to say that they're not brave.

What do you think?

Ian Varty
Angry faced, ruddy, tattie eatin' Highlander

The Power Wives of Toronto (and their meek, diaper changing metro-man slaves)

As is often the case, Wendy and I were way ahead of the curve on this one! It's a shame that we didn't make it on the cover of Toronto Life twenty years ago. Admittedly, at the time, we dressed more like a Harrowsmith family than corporate muppets. I still dress like a skater/granola/dirtball. Thankfully Wendy never once dressed like a Bay Street bitch (or a female Kevin O'Leary).

Give me plaid, or give me death.

We are New Brunswickers at heart, and always will be.

Toronto...The Final Frontier

A 'Sticky' Situation

The DMZ. The Berlin Wall. The Gaza Strip. No Man's Land. WalMart.

They all have one thing in common...they separate so-called enemies, except WalMart where people of all denominations, race, political outlook, and sexual persuasion come together to eat Big Macs and shop. As an aside, never have I been shopping in Holt Renfrew and thought to myself 'I could go for a Big Mac and fries'. As a further aside, never have I been shopping at Holt Renfrew.

Priscilla, my odd neighbour, hates me. I don't take it personally because I think she hates everyone, or if she doesn't, she will eventually. To quote a rather sage companion of mine "she doesn't play well with others". That pretty much sums it up.

Yesterday, a little Halloween hi-jinx. Priscilla dressed up as a hunter and went looking for wabbits...or Wartys. She didn't find any because this wabbit was down the wabbit hole (with video camera). I noted that Priscilla began by throwing sticks from her property over the fence into my yard. Those sticks are now in my forensics lab, being analyzed for proprietorial origin. Not satisfied with tossing branches, like grenades, over the wall, Priscilla moved to the front of the property and continued to toss handfuls of 'organics' over onto my property.

In the world of 'trick or treat', it looks as though I was treated to a trick. I wonder if she gave out many poison apples to the kiddies, or if she just plopped them directly into the cauldron??