The Economist magazine has declared Toronto the best city in the world in which to live, narrowly beating out Damascus, San Pedro Sula (Honduras), and Minto (N.B.). What makes Toronto so good? So, umm, livable?
I live here and I'm not sure. I think maybe it's the water, unless dog shit on the sidewalk makes for a winning lifestyle! Yes, it must be the water that puts us over the top. I was doing the dishes last night and was appalled by the amount of soap suds in the sink (in my defence, Wendy applied the dish-washing liquid and filled the sink). We have soft water here in Toronto; lovable, livable, adorable soft water.
Soft water is water that contains little calcium, magnesium, arsenic, mercury, or plutonium 238 (with its associated half-life of 87.7 years), or other unwanted ions.
You mean Ians?
No, I said 'ions'. There are two things that are appealing about soft water:
1) soap lathers well with soft water
2) you don't get a horrible looking yellow stain in your potty (just visit us in Cambridge-Narrows).
In Cambridge-Narrows we have hard water. Our toilet is forever yellowish and looking like I never flush it (which I do, at least once a week). It's like a tar sands tailing pond! When we wash clothes in our Cambridge-Narrows hard water, our whites are never white. It's hell, I tell ya. I get mocked by the other big city house-husbands because my lacy white frocks and bonnets always look stained. The jokes are as 'off colour' as my frilly bonnets. Sigh.
It's tough being you, isn't it, Ian?
It's hard like the water. Thank goodness I spend part of my time rehabilitating in Toronto. Toronto, if nothing else, may be the best city in the world to do the dishes or take a bubble bath. That's worth something. It's the best city in the world to clean the bathroom! My toilet is so clean that you could drink out of it. Many do...and then they go poop on the sidewalk. Bad, Fido!
No, Toronto is not the most livable city in the world. Not if you walk on the sidewalks everyday like I do.
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