In my world, I know of only five universal truths. I suppose you're interested to know what they are, so here they are in no particular order:
1) the employees at Environment Canada are banana eating, bum sniffing monkeys and they forecast wind by spinning a wheel. No kidding.
2) Jesus, if he, in fact, ever lived, was not a porcelain skinned, mink-haired stud muffin as portrayed in Christian propaganda and art.
3) Chocolate is good for you, end of story.
4) Women make better leaders and the world would be a better place if we had more of them. Note: there are a few minor technical exceptions to this rule, see Margaret Thatcher (nee Doubtfire).
5) Fortune cookies never lie.
I've found these five tenets to be true for all of my adult, semi-conscious life. Last evening, one of the five pillars of my life crashed to the ground and was shattered. Wendy, Julian, Dad and I went to a pan-Asian restaurant in Fredericton last evening. The service was great. The food was excellent, BUT......
The fortune cookie lied.
I'm not sure if you can read what my fortune says or not. It says 'something unusual will happen at work next week'.
Work? What's that?? I'm a leisurologist. I'm a stay-at-home Dad who doesn't stay at home (not withstanding that mini-me is almost 22 years old and infinitely more responsible than I am...and it's been that way for nearly 22 years). Also, I live in Cambridge-Narrows where nothing unusual has ever happened, at least not since the Mayor of the Village erected a statue of a bare-assed pig to greet visitors.
Again, because this is earth-shaking news, the fortune cookie lied. I'll never believe another one again which is unfortunate because they usually told me how responsible I was...and I believed them. This isn't enough to make me forego Asian restaurants in the future. Oh, no, but now I know that you can't believe everything you read. This will come as a shock to the readers of my gospel-like blog.
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