Exhibit A: Once a week we receive a flyer in our mail called the Sussex Herald. It's a smallish newspaper filled with ads, public service announcements, and topics of general interest to the people of Sussex and surrounding areas.
Exhibit B: On the cover of this week's issue was the headline 'How to help cure your insomnia on Page 29'. Although the cure to insomnia was offered on page 29, the authors of this publication also offered many other cures for insomnia long before the reader ever made it to the article on insomnia. Let's take a look.
Exhibit C: on page 3 you can read about three piece cookie tins. Yawn. Hmmm...why would a cookie tin need three pieces? Wouldn't you just need a barrel and a lid? Maybe the third piece is a cookie shovel (this is rural New Brunswick after all...we like our cookies). Not sure about the shovel though. Again, yawn.
Exhibit D: Page 9 gives us the low-down on a soapbox derby in Petitcodiac (about 20 minutes from Sussex). Like most of my readership, I'm a rabid soapbox derby enthusiast but because of my height I have a hard time Dove-tailing my ass into a soapbox. For this reason and this reason alone, this article is making me sleepy.
Exhibit E: The Restoration Fund Quilt Draw Winner article on page 16. Getting sleepy yet? I am, but since it's a short article I haven't yet nodded off. I need something just a tad less interesting. What could that be?
Exhibit F: Crokinole Club update on page 25........eyes..........getting.........slitty.......... I'm now laying on the floor in the fetal position with a pillow under my head. My insomnia is almost cured but I need one more knock on the head.
Exhibit G: Marigold Planting Invitation on page 26. It's an article about a good cause, nevertheless......Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Twitch. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
We finally lost Ian. He's asleep on the floor. Totally zonked. He never did make it to the insomnia article on page 29. Looks like he found another cure!
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