Pilfer? Make no mistake, it's stealing. Using the word pilfer makes it sound like a gentler way to steal.
I found some wild roses growing in a field. I thought that I knew who owned the field and I spoke to them about buying a couple of rose bushes from them. They said they sold the land to one of New Brunswick's utilities sometime ago, and that the utility doesn't even know they own it. They're suppose to keep it mowed which they haven't. This is why the rose bushes are thriving.
He said that I should just go dig them up. I'm tempted.
The only problem is that my back is bad at the moment and I don't want to do any shoveling. I would need to enlist 'the boy' to do the shoveling. Strictly speaking, this would be his introduction to crime. Theft under $40, punishable by two years less a day. That's his penalty, other than hanging out with his father.
Me? I'd likely go to the big house for my crime (criminally influencing a minor).
Wait a minute! I could plead that I was unduly influenced by my father. If I remember correctly, he pilfered some lady-slippers from the UNB woodlot when I was a boy. I could likely use this as a defense in court, that I was psychologically traumatized by me-old-man-knickin'-an-orchid.
Perfect! I'm off the hook. Julian.....get my shovel!
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