'Strife In My Life

There are three ways to classify plants:

1) the botanist's way, using Latin
(i.e. Lythrum salicaria )

2) the populist way, using English
(i.e. purple loosestrife)

3) The Ian way, using whatever is at your disposal
(i.e. that purply thingy).

Recently I saw a purply thingy in my garden, co-mingling with my variegated weigela (that stripy leafy bushy thing). I was intelligent enough to know that I didn't plant it, but dumb enough not to know what it was....though I had my suspicions.

I looked it up on-line and, sure enough, it was the dreaded purple loosestrife. My initial reaction was verbal. Bastard! My secondary reaction was violent in nature....must....kill! I grabbed its delightfully square stems and yanked it from my hallowed ground. Did I mention that I grabbed it with my teeth (see picture)? And I growled and shook my head from side to side like a Rockweiler clamping on a Sheltie's neck.

The purple loosestrife is no more. I done kilt it. Now I have no strife in my life, or garden, except for some unvulgar Lysimachia vulgaris which I planted on purpose. Not familiar with Lysimachia vulgaris? It's that yellowy thingy that seems to grow with ease and abandon. You can see it in two places in my garden, right next to all those greenish things.